6 Ways To Make Sure You Don't Hate Your Life.

It's been awhile & for that I am sorry. Mainly to myself because this blog is mostly for me to remember what was going on in my brain when I look back. Today I came across this video of a speech from Neil Gaiman and boy am I glad I did. I know that I am fortunate to be in love with what I do everyday, to (at times) be making things up as I go along, and to be making good art. I think it's important to make adjustments to your life if you don't like something...it's ok to make your own rules or to find your own way. 

If you wake up hating or dreading what you do everyday I challenge you to get up in the morning, put on a pot of coffee and make a list of the top 5 things you enjoy doing. Things that bring you the most joy. Then marinate on ways you can spend a majority of your life doing those things and surviving. I know what some of you might be thinking...I've heard it before: "that's a fairytale life, Steph" "I have kids or a significant other I have to support" "I need an adult job that pays the bills I don't have time to do things that make me happy for my career. That's all uncertain and unpredictable. I just need a normal job." I read this quote from Ellen once that stuck with me and ultimately was the catalyst for me handing in my resignation letter: "Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it." If that sums you up (like it did me at the time) and you are happy with it then press on friend and keep doing what you're doing! But if the thought of that makes you cringe in your bone marrow...make a change.

You only get one shot at life...could be 20 years long or 80 years long. Make it a good one that you're proud of and do your best to make it something you actually enjoy.

"I tended to do anything as long as it felt like an adventure and to stop when it felt like work. Which meant life did not feel like work."

"Make interesting mistakes, break rules...make the world more interesting for your being here. Make good art."

My Things.

A little bit about the things I use and/ or see everyday.

Camera: my newest/old film camera. I also have a Minolta that I have worked with way more. The camera strap is my favourite. I purchased it in Seal Beach, CA at a vintage shop.

Specs: Salt Optics are by far the best. I've been big on Ray Bans in the past but nothing competes with Salt [& they're handcrafted in my home state]. I sport the Yates.

Watch: This is definitely my go to watch. I have way too many watches for my own good...Vestal & Nixon are my favourite watches to wear. My brown wood Nixon Chalet was a gift to from my awesome coworker at Hurley, professional surfer Jodi Nelson. She's rad.

Create Mug: I have no idea where this was purchased...all I know is it was a thank you gift for shooting my friend from Hurley's mothers bday. Thanks Ri! I have used this every single day from the past 4 years.

iPhone4: this helps me run my business, stay connected & take amazing photos wherever I am in the world. Follow me on instagram.

Brown Leather Journal: I always have one of these by my side for thoughts or random doodles and ideas. This one is a brand new one that I just bought from Barnes & Noble...going to start a page a day with bullet points of major things that happened on that day.

1959 Bolex Paillard 8mm Movie Camera: This bad boy showed up on my doorstep from a childhood friend who used it as a paperweight. He thought I could get better use out of it. I am taking it to the local camera shop and am planning on using it for my roadtrip to South Carolina this summer. Thanks Kevin!!

Keep It Simple bracelet: Handcrafted by my talented friend at The Lazy Leatherworker. "Keep It Simple" is one of my favourite phrases...first heard it in Vermont. I bought a sticker for my guitar case while traveling there in the Fall of 2006. It's Vermont's state motto and a great reminder to me that less is more.

The paintbrush is...just a paintbrush without a story, but it is used to created my art and I love it.

Pretty Filthy.

I think I have found myself a new hobby....tried a new trail today and wow it was incredible. For once, I felt like I was in the mountains somewhere in Colorado and NOT in Arlington, TX. It smelled so good outside. The mosquitos had a small feast on my body...repellant must be purchased.

Next time I am taking my phone on the trail and getting some good shots of these rides we are doing. Might be going again on Sunday and Wednesday. I would definitely encourage all 2 of my readers haha to try new things....if you hate it at least you know to move onto something else. That rush you get when you're doing something that is unfamiliar is indescribable. I love watching people in their element and some of these bikers are super intense. We were pretty intense ourselves...even lost a pedal off one of the bikes. Try something new soon and tell me about it!!! Goodnight world.

Currently listening to: I Can't Hold Back by Survivor.

Thistle Farms. Ghana. Nashville. Stories.

Hi friends! This post is about a life changing organization I got to work with while I was in Nashville, TN called Thistle Farms. Thistle Farms is a social enterprise of Magdalene, which is a residential program for women who have survived lives of prostitution, trafficking, addiction and life on the streets. You know sometimes you just have those experiences that totally catch you off guard and you feel like you are right where you are supposed to be...well, that sums up my day spent with the women at Thistle Farms. Keep in mind, most of the time when I travel I go solo...just me and my camera. I like to get lost and meet people. So I made my way to their manufacturing facility in Nashville and had no idea what I was in for...but I was so excited to document the stories of these women and learn about the products that they've created [image on the left is a shot I took of a product I watched them create and package while I was there.] I was greeted right a way with a huge hug and "are you steph...the photographer?! I got my hair done for today!" And just like that I was in....lost in this amazing adventure. If you know me well...I don't cry very often. Let's just say I cried like a baby while sitting down with 2 of these women and hearing their stories. We cried together and hugged each other. Life is about connection. I had a "ah ha!" moment while sitting on that couch....I never EVER would've been sitting there listening to these amazing women tell me what they've been through and how proud they are of what they make if I had been sitting in a cubicle. It was a friday at 2pm...I am so happy I was far from what used to be comfortable and familiar. I am in the unknown everyday and it keeps me on my toes. Can't wait to share more about my entire Nashville trip soon! I left that day with a bag full of wonderful products, candles, a handmade journal, a happy heart and a bracelet I wear everyday that was made by women in Ghana. What an amazing creative trip. Follow Thistle Farms on Twitter. 
Currently listening to: 38 Special- Second Chance.

Bingo in Arlington, TX.

So I'm really trying to stick to my goal to post a photo everyday for 30 days on my blog with a quick story. Today I pulled over to get this shot....mostly because it reminded me of someone.

Sometimes I make adventure lists with important people in my life....on my last adventure list "play bingo with old people" was high on that list. Haven't done it just yet but tomorrow is a fresh day. Here are a few other things that were on that list that need to be accomplished sooner than later:

1. Ride in a hot air balloon.
2. Learn how to be a glass blower.
3. Shooting range.
4. Learn how to make pottery.
5. Volunteer more in Dallas.

Currently listening to: the Carpenters- Touch Me When We're Dancing

2011 from Steph's iPhone.

I appreciate everyone who made 2011 a great year. Ready for 2012♥

remember that one time i...

summed up 2010 in iPhone photos? [next post...a few photos summing up the first 6 months of 2011] I really can't believe I am packing up my apartment and moving out this month after being in Texas a year.



pretty much explains my life:

thinking about my house.

So...in the back of my mind [since that's where I get most of my blog material from anyway] I have been stashing away thoughts of when I own a house and how I will decorate it. I get the most excited when I think of my backyard. When I close my eyes at night I see pictures like the ones above...I see friends sipping wine, dinner parties...soft music, lots of laughter and conversation. It makes me so happy to know that one day I will make this happen. One day when this is actually happening I will sit back and watch from a distance and think of this time when I blogged about it.

Also, I watched 17 Again for the first time tonight and I think it was sweet...what I don't think was sweet was that they picked Chandler to play Zac Efron. Mistake.

One more thing, I am going to start a topic on here called "remember when..." since I haven't blogged consistently in forever. I will catch you up on my life with old stories and photographs. I looked back to 2007 & 2008 and realized sometimes I would post twice in a day. What a loser;)

Timing & Donald Miller.

I only recommend books every once in awhile. This one...really came into my life at the right time. It's been on my bookshelf for over a year now. One evening in 2009 I was dodging cars in Greenwich Village in New York heading to meet some friends for dinner at Benito One in Little Italy. I was on one of my "solo adventures"...exploring the city all alone. I loved these trips. They were dangerous. They were full of life. They are the ones that seem to stick out in my mind the most. My plan was to eat dinner, have a glass of wine then I was off to see new things. After dinner, I quickly ducked into Barnes & Noble and ran right to this book...I had been wanting to pick it up. I went to a local coffee shop and sat myself down for hours. Reading. When later my friend Andrew, whom I had met on my last trip to the city, met me and he talked about how he was thinking about studying abroad in Buenos Aires. It was only a spark in his eye then. I got back home (California at the time) and got busy. This happened for a reason. I needed that section of the book in November 2009...shortly after that, I quit my 9-5pm job and decided to start something new, to begin a new chapter in my story. Recently, I saw this book on my bookshelf...so much has changed. I am now living alone in Dallas, TX...doing work that I love, away from my family, but meeting amazing people and seeing new places everyday. I read the last half of the book last night and this morning. Over a year later and it's EXACTLY what I needed to hear when I needed to hear it. I went back to the city a few months ago and Andrew and I said our goodbyes, we barely caught each other...he was off to Beunos Aires to write more of his story. I admire that in people...it takes courage. I challenge myself daily to live a more meaningful story, and so should you....anyway that you can.

I really suggest getting "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years" and reading it. I want to hear your story...I want to discuss this book with someone. I'll be reading it again soon. (click the image to buy)

What story are you telling? from Rhetorik Creative on Vimeo.

If only for a minute.

I seriously cannot get enough of this....my fave is between 1:35-2:30. WATCH IT LOVE IT Thanks Danielle.



"take yourself out dancing to a club where no one knows you. stand on the outside of the floor until the lights convince you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like nobody's watching cause they're probably not. The way bodies move genuinely to beats is afterall gorgeous and affecting. Dance until you're sweating and beads of perspiration remind you of life's best things...down your back like a brook of blessings."

"go to the woods alone and the trees and squirrels will watch for you. go to an unfamiliar city...there are always statues to talk to. Give strangers a shared existence if only for a minute. Might have never happened had you not been there by yourself."

2010 is half way over. A picture update.

From Jan 2010- June 2010 i (in no particular order)....

Quit my day job...said goodbye to Hurley & said hello to a life outside of the cubicle...



Went to Europe for the first time (London, Wales, Ireland...) view more HERE






Was thankful for a fun group of friends in Long Beach...



Was once again thankful for a very supportive group of friends who helped me cause a ruckus at the airport over JetBlue stealing my camera. More HERE




Went to New York City to catch up with amazing friends & explore the city. More NYC HERE







Went to Stagecoach...more craziness HERE





Went on a Santa Monica/LA day trip & ate cheese and drank wine:)

RESIGNATION.

Well‭, ‬for the 2‭ ‬of you that follow this blog‭.....Sometimes you have to stop what you're doing and go in a different direction. That time is now. ‬I handed in my letter of resignation this week‭. ‬Usually it's‭ ‬hard to quit a job that people refer to as‭ "‬the dream job‭"...‬where I make good money‭, ‬get hookups and meet celebrities‭. ‬I was definitely comfortable‭. ‬BUT come to find out‭, ‬it actually was easier than I thought and I can honestly say I have no fear at this‭ ‬point‭. ‬There are more important things to do with my time on this earth and NOW is the time to do it‭. ‬You have no idea just how‭ ‬excited I am‭. ‬I will keep this short‭...‬but stay tuned for more info‭. ‬If you need a photographer or a website designed‭...‬I'm your girl‭. ‬I have many side projects lined up and I am looking forward to finally turning over a new leaf‭. ‬

‭Last day at Hurley International‭: ‬02.10.10‭.
‭
On the set of SLIDERS TV‭...‬production crew‭.



3 COMMENTS:

corykhill said...
First order of business now that you've quit the business. Come to India and help me design a website. They wont pay you, but it'll be AMAZING!
JANUARY 30, 2010 7:53 AM

bonnie m. said...
and then come to boston and be my roommate.
JANUARY 30, 2010 11:18 PM

steph said...
both sound like amazing offers!! seriously. I am so excited you have no idea<3

twenty-somethings‭.

"‬People have enough to live‭, ‬but nothing to live for‭; ‬they have the means‭, ‬but no meaning‭.‬‮”‬‭ -‬Robert Fogel

Why are so many twenty-somethings quitting their jobs and hitting the road‭? ‬What are the common threads between us‭? ‬What binds us‭? ‬Is it a hunger for something more than a nine to five‭? ‬Is it the need to hear other peoples‮’‬‭ ‬stories to help us on our own path‭? ‬Are we realizing that security and comfort are merely societal constructs that‭, ‬in truth‭, ‬are holding us back from experiencing the passion of life‭? ‬

And what is the root of our discontent‭? ‬I believe it is a combination of our upbringing into a society that values money‭, ‬power‭,‬‭ ‬and success‭. ‬A society‭, ‬whose definition of success is so out of line with true happiness‭. ‬So what is the answer to our discontent‭? ‬I will take a leap here and say that ONE of the answers is to find fulfillment through helping and serving others‭, ‬rather than being so concerned about our own position in life‭. ‬I believe helping those in need fills us from the inside‭. ‬Are we recognizing the beauty in being laid off‭? ‬Are we realizing that maybe‭ - ‬just maybe‭ - ‬losing our jobs and our money was the best thing that could‮’‬ve ever happened to us‭? ‬

This is our revolution‭. ‬It‮’‬s a quiet and rather somber revolution on the outside‭, ‬but inside our stifling eight by eight cubicles‭, ‬we are screaming‭. ‬We are desperate for something more than what we were taught would make us happy.This is our call to action‭. ‬This is us giving ourselves permission to be free‭, ‬and in turn‭, ‬reconciling all of those who are searching for that same freedom‭. ‬

‭** ‬A BLOG WRITTEN BY MY GOOD FRIEND LAUREN‭ **

COMMENTS‭: ‬1 COMMENTS:

lauren said...
:) So happy for what you are doing and what you will do. <3 <3
JANUARY 31, 2010 5:38 AM

there's gotta be something more.

Don't tell my work but it's 9:27am and I have done absolutely nothing today except‭:‬

1‭. ‬drink coffee‭ ‬
2‭. ‬eat lowfat blueberry muffin
3‭. ‬read blogs‭ ‬
4‭. ‬have intense conversations on facebook with complete strangers that make me think
5‭. ‬think about the future‭. ‬cultivating relationships/moving/helping others
6‭. ‬research new books‭ (‬by Daniel H‭. ‬Pink‭)‬
7‭. ‬about to pray before a work meeting
8‭. ‬drink more coffee
9‭. ‬zone out‭.‬
10‭. ‬fold a paper airplane

I can't focus because it all seems pointless‭. ‬I am making good money to sit in a cube to make money for a very successful company‭, ‬to gain status‭, ‬to make more money‭, ‬so that I can live comfortably and have nice things for myself‭. ‬When really all I want to‭ ‬do is something completely different‭. ‬hmm‭...‬keep following me‭. ‬Something is going to happen this year‭. ‬Just don't know when yet‭ ‬but It's time‭.‬

‭QUESTION OF THE DAY‭ (‬I can't stop thinking about it‭...‬thanks Matt‭)‬

‭why do you think it is necessary to work in a mode that you are not passionate about in order to attain a lifestyle that you are passionate about‭? -‬Matthew Addington

Everybody's Fine.

The trailer doesn't do this movie justice. I used to not cry during movies....that has all changed. Tonight I went with my family to see this movie at the cheap theatre. I had no idea what I was in for. Recently, and by recently I mean several years....I have been struggling with something. I don't care to talk about it with most people but I'll write about it on here because it needs to be outside of me for once. This is really hard for me to write because I feel like no matter what words come out no one will understand what I am trying to get at, but I will try anyway. Talking in code is pretty entertaining and if people took the time...I guess it's not too hard to figure out what I'm talking about. As most of you know I am really good at tip toeing around topics (which makes complete sense now)....I'm starting to get over that and becoming more real by the second.

Basically, the main topics of this movie (and the main things I have been struggling with):
1. truth being hidden from people close to us for other people's happiness.
2. keeping things from people because they can't handle it.
3. not really knowing the people closest to us when they are the ones that should know us best.
4. wanting to take it back and finally get to know someone when it's too late.
5. living in denial & avoiding issues that make us uncomfortable.

Point is... Very few truly know me. my family doesn't even know me. Honestly, they will be shocked when they find this blog when I die. They have known me for almost 27 years and are the people I love most in this life and yet...still, they only know what I tell them or what they choose to hear. As I sat there in the theatre with them...I sunk low into my chair and sobbed quietly. I hoped as they were watching this movie that they would somehow get the message. The message that their daughter wants them to know her. My friend said something interesting to me last night...she said, "parents are mostly there to help us when we fall....maybe they're not supposed to be a part of every step of the journey." That sure made me think. At this point one major thing is coming between us and it is very hard not to hate that thing....I have to understand and I cannot be mad at them. Life is about love....about the people we meet along the way that help shape us into who we are. Life's too short to put up barriers between the ones we love most...no matter how we were raised. Love is more important than an old set of rules any day and if I ever have kids they will be raised to know that. I've learned that avoiding things and living in denial is easier than hearing the truth...and it's also the worst way to live. But hey, they know one thing for sure....steph's always fine.

East Coast SOLO ADVENTURE!

Last month I decided to go all by myself to the East Coast‭. ‬Baltimore‭, ‬Philly‭, ‬Delaware‭, ‬Connecticut‭, ‬Rhode Island‭, ‬Boston‭ ‬&‭ ‬NYC‭. ‬Needed a vacation‭...‬new scenery mostly‭. ‬About a week before I left I decided I would throw something together in an attempt to‭ ‬test something out‭ (‬which will remain confidential for the time being‭). ‬I wanted to see how many Hurley fans I could find while‭ ‬I was there and I would give them free stuff and interview them‭. ‬Didn't really expect to find many‭. ‬Threw out a line and got a‭ ‬bite‭....‬a big bite‭. ‬Making cupcakes in NYU students apartments at midnight‭, ‬playing drums on Bleecker with new friends‭, ‬having coffee and breakfast with strangers for hours‭. ‬Really‭, ‬this trip goes down in my book as one of the best trips ever‭...‬solo adventures are where it's at‭. ‬I got to hear so many stories that will stick with me forever‭...‬and THAT is what life is all about‭. ‬check out the video I threw together of some of the awesome people I met on my trip‭. ‬One day I hope to do this for good and by the way‭...‬the still shot of my face on this video is amazing haha‭.‬

1 COMMENTS:

corykhill said...
India... Steph should go to India. I'm just sayin.

the turning point‭.

This is documentation of one girls dream to do something MORE‭. ‬That girl is me‭.‬

We all have those thoughts about that THING‭. ‬That one thing we may never do before we die‭. ‬we write about it and go on brain trips about the‭ "‬what ifs‭" ‬in life surrounding that THING‭. ‬How many of us really take those thoughts and have our way with them‭? ‬Sure‭, ‬some of us quit our jobs in search of a variety of things‭...‬or maybe‭, ‬just maybe in search of absolutely nothing at all‭. ‬just because it feels right‭.‬

I'm Steph‭. ‬I'm 26‭. ‬In those 26‭ ‬years I have lived in 1‭ ‬place‭...‬Orange County‭, ‬CA‭. ‬I am climbing that corporate ladder right now‭ ‬&‭ ‬have been since I was 20‭, ‬why‭? ‬Because it's what we are raised to do‭. ‬go to school‭, ‬get a job‭, ‬take out loans to go to school‭ ‬again‭, ‬marry a man‭ (‬if you're a woman‭), ‬get a better job‭, ‬have kids and raise them to do the same‭. ‬Honestly‭, ‬I skipped out on a‭ ‬majority of those things‭. ‬Mmmmm‭...‬doesn't this sound good‭...‬dripping with success‭, ‬dream job‭, ‬brand new car‭, ‬closets full of clothes‭, ‬a crapload of computer/photography/music equipment‭, ‬living comfortably‭, ‬having enough money to spend frivolously‭, ‬living‭ ‬&‭ ‬working 5‭ ‬minutes from the beach‭, ‬working for a big name surf brand‭...‬maybe even one day that white picket fence‭, ‬yeah‭? ‬Sounds‭ ‬like a pretty dang good life‭. ‬If you don't know me you'd think I was bragging‭. ‬Rest assured‭, ‬I am not‭. ‬I am blessed to be where‭ ‬I am right now‭ ‬&‭ ‬I know I didn't get here on my own‭. ‬People might say by leaving this life behind that I take it for granted‭. ‬I‭ ‬have spent the last 26.5‭ ‬years doing what I was doing for a reason‭...‬to get me right here in this moment‭. ‬The turning point‭.‬

What it really comes down to‭... ‬I am tired‭. ‬Tired of spending my time doing pointless tasks that don't help a single person besides myself‭. ‬And am I really helping myself‭? ‬With that success comes‭...‬long days/nights‭, ‬ridiculous amounts of stress‭, ‬being cramped in a bubble‭, ‬saggy eyes‭, ‬wearing stiff clothes‭, ‬no time for cultivating friendships‭, ‬never leaving the familiar‭, ‬maybe even‭ ‬seeing the same people everyday‭, ‬not having time to do things that make my heart happy‭, ‬working hard to pay the bills just to come home and sleep in the house you pay for‭...‬then wake up and do it all over again‭. ‬FOR YEARS‭. ‬All for what‭? <‬span style‭="‬font-weight:bold‭;">‬TO DIE‭. ‬We work so hard every single day and we don't get to take any of that with us‭. ‬what do we leave here‭ ‬when our bodies are buried under a mound of dirt‭? ‬The memories and love that we shared with others‭. ‬Have we missed the point‭? ‬I‭ ‬think yes‭. ‬Follow me on my journey into the unknown‭....‬and share your stories with me too‭. ‬This could get interesting‭. ‬

2 COMMENTS:

bonnie m. said...
i fucking love this. and you.
DECEMBER 8, 2009 10:24 PM

Steph said...
bonnie!! you made me smile realllll big just now. 
miss you large amounts!
DECEMBER 21, 2009 12:06 PM

a bit irritated at this point.

i am frustrated to the point of tears right now. when i get upset i bite my cheeks and do dishes forcefully (i think i got that from my mom haha). i scrub countertops, organize drum hardware & dust between piano keys. Stuff that I know I can fix immediately. i feel better now. you guys (whomever you are) seriously...life is so short & I am reminded of that everyday I get closer to dying. sounds morbid but really....it's not. Truth is, in 2010 I am moving. Moving away from Orange County...as far away from it as I can get actually. This involves leaving my family after 26 years of either being in the same house or being right across the street from them. Without going into too much detail....i am frustrated for the following reasons:

1. if your family wants to do something (let's say...go on a roadtrip to Seattle over Christmas break) and is excited about it...suck it up, don't be selfish. This could be the last time you spend with them and when you're at their funeral crying and trying to remember all of the good memories... you would give anything to have that time back.

2. people aren't going to do stuff for you your entire life. Be an adult. Grow up. One day people won't cater to you anymore.

3. if you find yourself bored or needing to be entertained on a regular basis assess your life....there are SO many things to do. Find a hobby, figure out what your heart loves...find your passion and hold onto it tight with both hands. Once you find that...things stem from that and eventually you find yourself with too much to do and it's exciting!

4. if i decide to make you a present for christmas and you already bought mine don't say "oh, i wish i would've known that so i didn't spend so much money".....really? we have really missed the point of the holidays if that's our attitude.

5. i have half a mind (okay maybe a little more than half) to quit everything and just go see my family...my extended family. My friends, new friends and meet people....let them know I am thankful for them and love them. am i too sappy? probably. do people read this and think....steph that's not life, you just CAN'T do that...you have responsibilities. you have to make money, get a house...settle down. yeah. watch me.

my dad just called to check on me...:) my family is great. i think frustration with people is good because it forces you to put things in your own life into perspective and make adjustments. okay enough ranting for now. i don't know why i even put this on here. i just had an idea that came from this blog....time to start it.

Monday smiles.

I LOVE videos that make me smile. There are so many interesting people in the world...meeting people & hearing stories...doesn't get much better than that. the duckduck collective really captures that.

Figs & Ginger from John Carl on Vimeo.

poison & wine.

this actually makes my heart ache....the lyrics, the expressions, the emotion, the way it's filmed, the angles, the pain, the fact that they know the other is so close... it is physically hurting them to keep their eyes off of each other. a song about contradictions. struggle. something sweet but something that will kill you. i love everything about this song/video and i can't get enough of it. it's because it makes me think....what is this really about? a couple having a hard time in their relationship...two people that can't be together for whatever reason but the passion is so strong it's almost palpable, or maybe they know it just isn't going to work out but they want it to so badly. the world may never know. i don't have a choice but i still choose you. i don't love you but i always will.