vinyl, accordions, and martinis...

Stage lights danced freely within the crevices of the ceiling's architectural curves as the music repeatedly had it's way with my soul. It was out of my hands...I had a healthy buzz and a hungry heart...a recipe for the sweetest disaster. Sure enough, my mind escaped as I closed my eyes. from his lips came raspy, echoing words-forever a permanent fixture in my mind. That concert was amazing...correction, the word amazing does not do it justice. Leona Naess came as a pleasant surprise..we walked in not knowing the opening musician. the song "Ballerina" has always been one of my favourites... we walked away thoroughly impressed by every single one of her songs. Ray LaMontagne captivates the audience in a gentle way...you find yourself studying the shape of his rugged face with each crescendoed phrase. After the show we decided to cut through the Enchanted Forrest of Los Angeles. Wet grass and pine needles under the tallest trees. I took off my Houndstooth high heels and we started running and singing. I enjoyed the beauty in that moment and the sap on my bare feet. Wish you were there. Photos courtesy of TA and iPhones. Goodnight!

Behind the Jeans.

people always knew when she had an interesting night. her hair was bigger than usual and her reading glasses always fell to the very tip of her nose before she pushed the corner of them up with her middle finger. Usually she pushed them up when they got halfway. she sipped her coffee more frequently on days like today...almost gulping, as if it were a cantine of water in the sahara. If you listened closely you could hear the jingling sound of her silver rings making their way up and down her finger...guided gently by her thumb. Below her desk was a small pile of denim strings...everyone always wondered about those jeans of hers, seemed like every hole had an interesting story.

a late night quote.

"Someone made up all of these stupid titles and all I really want to do is love someone"

i never have understood all of the relationship titles. we're "seeing each other". Does that mean you are also seeing other people as well? sure you are unless you do not have sight. we're "together"...well, yeah...that's comforting and sweet. Does that mean you are committed to one another, in love...loyal, honest? At what point do things become offical, and what title is that...marriage? courting? When did relationships become selfish and non-committal? While I was on this last work trip I had a few conversations with girls that had just been broken up with after 3 and 4 year relationships. they thought it would end in marriage...they had discussed houses, family etc. I wonder what their titles were..."dating" i think...just seems like a loose and flipant term that can be destroyed at any point when someone needs space. If you need "space" from someone after 4 years odds are that you will eventually need a break later on down the road too. When did we stop working on things, sitting down and really dissecting issues that come up...figuring out a plan to better the relationship. Instead, it is easier to just back off...because after all, it's just a title that is easily broken. hmmm i am thinking that i will have to invent my own title in order for it to genuinely mean something to myself and the person I am with. interesting.

A wine so sweet is the taste of your mouth...

San Francisco from an iPhone. just got home a little while ago and crashed on the couch. I always take home distinct memories from trips...i shove them deep into my pockets. I tried to capture them on my phone but they didn't turn out as well as my brain pictures. One moment I didn't get to catch was from this morning...driving on the Golden Gate bridge with 5 friends smooshed in the the backseat of a taxi cab. our arms around each other, heads heavy on shoulders from exhaustion... hair blowing in every direction. It was crisp. A soft song played in the background and the wind from the bay made our cheeks cold. i know, at that very moment, i closed my eyes and was happy for so many reasons.







Oh roses and cigarettes
Pillow case that remembers you
the scent of you still lingers on my fingertips
Till I think I might go insane
When will I see you again

-Ray LaMontagne

above the clouds...

i spend a lot of time above the clouds...i just got off of an airplane yesterday and will be back on one first thing tomorrow morning. Only to be back on one again in hmm 17 days. I spent time on my last flight looking out the window at the clouds...i sat there in awe for a good 15 minutes with my head propped up against my hand. I wondered if people thought about clouds as much as i do.... i thought of everything they remind me of, then got distracted by a portion of the wing that seemed to be coming loose. My thought process is wild and my imagination gets the best of me a majority of the time.

Anyway, i fly to san fran tomorrow morning for work...i'm shooting a hurley launch party at a club called Club 6ix and staying at Hotel Triton. There will be mobile updates on my facebook so make sure to check them out. I just downloaded Ray LaMontagne's newest CD and am about to light a candle and pack. I bought mittens today for my new york trip...God knows I don't need them here, it's supposed to be 91 tomorrow in HB. ew sick.

my heart.

i leave tiny bits and pieces of my heart behind when I travel....secretly tucked away in places that I want to visit again. One day when I am ready to settle down and give my heart away, we will go back to all of our favourite spots, gather up the pieces and put them together over coffee.

i am doing this one day.

today's facts.

i look forward to Christmas morning.
today is a great day and i love it.
i am excited for this next week to fly by.
i like flannel sheets a lot.
i love hearing happy voices on the phone.
toffee nut latte toppings need to come back into my life.
i miss tight hugs...because we all know tight hugs are the right hugs.
i want to curl up on a couch and read a good book.

happy october 10th!

gets me everytime...!

ladies and gentlemen...my cousin, Ryan Meadows. For those of you who ask "what happened after Chad (the cameraman) ran off?!" Well, if you are familiar with Arden Mall in Sacramento, those stores are pretty high...after his legs went through the roof of a store...Ryan jumped down, ran from mall security and hid under cars in the parking lot. They all got caught. Obviously, there is not much to do in Sacramento, CA.

shuffle.

every morning on the way to work i put my ipod on shuffle...i feel like the songs that play are the songs that i need to hear for that day.

a brick to the head.

"there are only two ends to this dance.
You can flee with your wounds just in time, or lie there as he feeds,
watching yourself ripped to shreds and laughing as you bleed."

Trusting your heart to someone is probably one of the scariest things ever. The first time is easy. The second time...you give people the benefit of the doubt and say...all people aren't jerks, right? The third time...you question motives, you hesitate, you worry about things that never crossed your mind before. I believe God has a reason for everything....things happen, you learn from your mistakes, they form you into who you are right now...question is, are you happy with you've become? Am I, Steph Grant...happy with who I have become, am I being the change i want to see, am I honest, considerate and making wise choices? God knows, i am trying. I've had some pretty low points and I am not afraid to admit it...things haven't been a walk in the park, they've been crappy at times. i have hurt others... i have been hurt. i've been bitter, angry, stubborn, furious, devastated and disappointed...but through those times I have seen what i am capable of, I have seen what others are capable of...and now the road ahead doesn't seem so hard...i look forward to every step.

beats. tasty...delicious beats.

these guys played at Hurley Nights on Friday night.....check them out if you like to feel beats in your bone marrow...
click here

teeth of comb.

To this day I still hate the squeaking of laytex balloons...not just because it's annoying, but because it makes my hairs stand on end. I was 10 years old. All of the kids in the car had balloons after the fair and I thought I was going to go crazy. My mom had just given me a brand new comb for my birthday. I was desperate at this point, I broke the teeth off the comb one by one...and the balloons started popping...one by one, I sat there laughing quietly...rejoicing silently in their defeat. (love you dad...you have great stories)

Fall is finally here again...

well, hello from bed. So my three favourite months are here again...October-December. How time flies. I love seeing pumpkin patches on every street corner while driving to work, I miss the way the frost settled on the cars at night while I was in night classes. I miss barnes and noble trips for a warm seasonal beverage, a good book and comfy couch. this time of year always makes me way too sentimental for my own good. Maybe it's the crisp air...the falling leaves, the Christmas carols and decorating...I just feel more alive and I love it. There's nothing better than sharing these times with someone you care about...someone who will walk hand in hand with you in central park. someone who will take you ice skating and hug you and not let you go for a very long time. It's good to be with family...singing, baking and watching Elf 12 times. I think this has potential of being my favourite fall yet, I look forward to everyday of it. Here are a few things I get to be excited about:

1. A cold/rainy day at disneyland with my whole family.

2. Julian.

3. Decorating home and hot chocolate. ;)

4. Flying to San fran with work friends.

5. 2 week vacation and Autumn in New York (not the movie)

6. The raw fruit cleanse for the next 5 days with Jordan.

7. Full body massage.

8. Movie/cooking night

9. working my butt off, just. wed. Was my 1 year anniv at hurley, crazy!

10. Colgate 360.

while you're pooping!