a blog about time.

"sadness is a manifestation of memories which you cannot change, fear stems from trying to predict the future. that leaves... NOW as our only option for certain happiness."

This blog is raw. I haven't thought about what I want to type or even the point I am trying to make...actually a majority of my blogs are not thought out, not one bit. I sit down, put on music, and my fingers just go.

i stumbled upon that quote tonight...and I have mixed feelings about it. A love/hate relationship if you will. The reason for this said relationship is because I am not a fan of living in the moment....because every time I have "lived in the moment" I have known it to be a horrible decision on my part...I was not in a good place, I shook my head at myself....and longed for something real. Something that would eventually go somewhere. Something with passion and certainty, that i could hold onto with everything inside of me...a romance that was palpable. But if we do not act on something that might eventually work out...where does that leave us? "in the moment"...and how long do we remain in that moment before accepting it for what it is? Instead it leaves us worried...nervous, and fearful...of what might happen in the future, who we will hurt...who will hurt us. I was hoping after I typed my feelings out I would gain some sort of perspective in regards to this quote....but no, not really...i find myself still wondering what it is we are searching for. What we are scared of. Are we afraid of opening up... only to add to those distant memories that linger around like the Cranberries...

"fear stems from trying to predict the future" i think that is the part that i am hung up on. Maybe I will have an epiphany at some point this week, maybe I should drink some Smart Water...i hear it helps. I am a firm believer in the saying, "time reveals all" but until that "time" comes...i feel stuck in the moment. Interesting. They were the best of times...they were the best of times.

goodnight friends.